Day 21 Heart by Mary Gow
Today was a day of many conversations. In several of them I mentioned that I had this heart project. What I noticed this time was different than I had noticed in the past. This time I took the time to listen to how the person responded — not only by words, but did the person hearing what I was saying show any amount of interest in what I was up to?
Or was it a one-way all their way?
Thanksgiving isn’t especially the best time to check to see if who you surround yourself with are as supportive as you hope but I was interested to see the results of my small experiment.
Did anyone want to check out my website when I mentioned it? Did anyone ask what the URL or domain name was?
Granted holidays are a great time to be in touch with people close to us. People we hold dear.
It might be an interesting experiment to see if they’re as interested in your life as you are in theirs. OR holidays might be the WORST time because inevitably aren’t many people absorbed in their own worlds?
Over the course of several conversations with friends I realized one person in particular after mentioning this heart project and my daily postings didn’t express any interest in seeing them on the internet. Instead they suggested I give up the project, or scale back and not do one every day, or the full 100 days.
Could it be this person was reflecting back my own feelings? Or what? In some way were they testing my commitment? I entertained their idea of giving up or not doing today’s heart.
The testing may be what a friend does for us. I would hope for at least asking “Where can I see those hearts, Mary?”
Do we really have the conviction to follow through as originally planned? Is the project worth it? I thought about why am I doing this if hardly anyone sees it?
I’m working on this because I want to share my hearts at a time I think we could all use some heart.
So I’ll continue, and see how I feel tomorrow.
Today, grateful for friends and family, and considering: whose opinion really matters?
“I’d rather have friends who care than friends who agree with me.” – Arlo Guthrie
Already Day 20 and 80 more to Valentine’s! 
